Friday, April 16, 2010

Shit on the ground

Someone fucking pooped in the LQ Kitchen last night. What the fuck. Here's the email from Joanne Goldwater. I like how she uses the word disappointed, makes me feel like my mom is yelling at me or something.

Dear LQ Residents,

I have just been notified that a Bon Appetit employee showed up to work this morning at the Grab-n-Go to find human feces on the Lewis Quad kitchen floor. She called Public Safety and sanitized the floors and cabinets with bleach and water.

I am quite disappointed about this incident. This is disgusting and unacceptable anywhere on campus, but most especially in a kitchen area used for food preparation.

As a result of this behavior, the LQ kitchen will be closed after Grab-n-Go closes at 2 p.m. for the rest of the semester. Residents can only use the kitchen when RA staff are on-duty at night. We regret that this action is necessary, but it is due to the inexcusable behavior of an unknown person(s).

If you have any information regarding the identification of the person(s) responsible for this behavior, please contact a member of the Residence Life staff or Public Safety. We will reopen the kitchen if the responsible
person(s) comes forward or is identified.

Joanne Goldwater
Associate Dean of Students/Director of Residence Life


  1. 1) I marked this post a shitty and laughed to myself.
    2) Man that email is probably embarrassing for whoever did have an emergency and thought no one would ever know!

  2. Dear Mr. Benjes,

    I wonder how more than one person can be involved in pooping on the floor. Did they poop in a pile? Did one person coach the other through it?

    Also, if you were to use the bristol stool scale, what number would it be?

    Yours in poop,


  3. i almost just shit my pants laughing at this.

  4. Reminds me of an email we got while at oxford because someone shit in a bag and threw it out the window, almost hitting a pedestrian three stories down. Shit flinging is not cool.

  5. I think it's really annoying that all of LQ gets their kitchen closed for this. How do they even know that a person from LQ did it? Everyone knows where the Grab and Go is. I wish they'd put a security camera there or something...

    Also the International House is in LQ and to take the kitchen away from the TAs (again) is not very nice. They don't all have another kitchen to use, and they make stuff for events all the time.