PANIC: Someone has Stolen a Pillar!

Now that school is back in session I am back on campus (since I am a "student") so I went around documenting some changes. Look forward to boring/moderately funny posts in the coming days.

Now as you can see, one of the posts near Calvert is missing. Did someone steal it? Did Urgo steal it? Did someone run a car into it, just like a few years ago near the Statehouse?

Urgo: A Postmortem

I liked Dr. Joseph Urgo from the very first day I realized I could combine his name into Jurgo (I think multiple people realized this at the same time, idk). I still like him and still think he was a pretty okay President. There are definitely some things that he did that I disagreed with like:

• Restructuring of Admissions and Financial Aid(e)
• Firing of Edgar
• Pat Goldsmith
• "failure to engage with student activists re: living wage and meatless mondays"
• Rebranding as a more "elite/quasi-private" school
• Fedoras
• Leslie's massive power over staff 

But what I really liked about him, more than Maggie, was that he was visible. I met Maggie twice, and only because of my involvement in SGA. And granted, he was probably very visible to me because it was his first year, and he wanted to make a good/visible presence that first year, so my thoughts and memories are a bit rose-tinted I suppose. So here are some of my fond memories of the man:

• Inviting he and his wife to dinner at our Townhouse Senior Year
• Vespa Scooter
• Weekly Open Hour
• Weekly Radio Show
• Beard
• Baldness
• Kinda funny and very casual with students
• Let us get eat crabs and drink at his house (buy it now for only 900k!)
• p chill dude

So IDK I mean it's definitely easy to blame this whole situation on Urgo, and probably a lot of it is his fault, but I still liked the dude I guess. That said, my favorite Townie made this for the blog, a SMCM Red Wedding~

 So leave your thoughts in the comments, what his "legacy" will be (via hot or not)

President Urgo's House is For Sale

http://www.zillow.com/homedetails/47157-S-Snow-Hill-Manor-Rd-Lexington-Park-MD-20653/37587679_zpid/

That is all.

Joe Urgo on Facebook

Do yall ever get on facebook, usually in the mornings, and take a look at which of your friends are online.  And then you see it.  You see that Joe Urgo, Prezbro, is online.  Waiting to chat.

Wonder if anybody ever 'chats him up'.  Just smiling there (also note his profile picture is from the 2011 graduation, arguably one of the best SMCM graduations in the past year), waiting for u to chat him.

What would you say?  R U 2 Scared to chat the Prezbro?

"I ain't a-scared of no ghosts Urgos" - The Ghostbusters (circa 1980s)

Hate to admit that IDK what I would say.  Feel like I would bother him and his busy schedule of wearin' hats, going 2 meetings, and other Presidential things. 

Wonder what he does on Fbook all day.  Wonder if he is more of a 'farmville' kinda guy, or more into 'Word with friends'.  Do yall think he is a DrawSomethinger???  Wonder if he plays Team Fortress 2 and collects hats (obscure nerd reference, BTW trading Buds for Unusual Hats). 

 Do I spend too much time contemplating this??? [answer:  yes]

In conclusion, here is a short documentary by Deanna Clements and some other bros about Urgo http://vimeo.com/39659262 which is fairly entertaining.

I dare yall to chat up Urgo and post results in the comments.  Anyone with good chat convos/screenshots will win a prize (IDK beer probably)

Urgo Exercises, Just Like Everyone Else

Was on the facingbook earlier today instead of doing homework when I noticed a creepy status update by his stalker

Seems like she is in love with the Prezzy???  Glad to see that Urgo has mastered the elliptical machine in the Michael P. O'Brien Athletics and Recreation Center, as it is something that has always confused me.  I've tried and continually felt like I was going to fall off, so I went back to the stationary bikes. 

Diggin' that he is using a low-impact exercise in order to reduce his risk of injury.

Also enjoying that he watches the Colbert Report via liberal values.

Also enjoying that people make status updates about him when they see him, and then people make blog posts about seeing those people make status updates.

Boh Hunt photo

Step 1:  Steal photo the President of the school posted
Step 2:  Repost said photo
Step 3:  ???
Step 4:  Profit

Jurgo Street Sign

President Urgo got a new sign for his house.  He posted it on facebook so that potential stalkers will now have a much easier time stalking him, which I think is really considerate to those potential stalkers.  More people should try to make life easier for stalkers, because there is already a lot of (justifiable) social stigma attached to stalking.

Looking at the sign itself, it would appear to be a mid 18th century New England design (via that is my initial guess).  It looks like a very pretty sign, and there appears to be something attached on the right side of it.  Is it a mailbox?  Some sort of box that has pamphlets that give stalkers even more information?  It's hard to say, and I won't know until it's nicer out and I ride my bicycle by.  Not because I'm stalking, but because his house is on a really nice bike route.  First I ride up to Cook's and buy a slice of pizza or possible some beverage, and then ride back on the scenic route which happens to contain his current residence.

Assuming there isn't a mailbox attached, I wonder if the mailbox also has his house number.  That would be kinda redundant, but it would also be a pain to remove the number from the mailbox.  CONUNDRUMS ABOUND


What do yall think about this sign???

Jurgo Radio Today, I am the Guest

lolwat.  Listen today at noon.  Will either be great or a trainwreck.  Probably the former!

Dinner with the Urgos

Back in November my house hosted a dinner party and we invited Joe and Lesley Urgo!  I don't think I blogginged (for some reason I think it's amusing to write stuff like bloggering and bloggered instead of using real words) about this event though!

My house had been hanging out together one night when we decided that inviting the President over for dinner was a good idea.  Some months later we finally did it!

It was pretty wonderful.  I made mashed potatoes from a box (superior to real mashed potatoes) and Mike Tornabene made fried chicken, because he is from the South.  They even signed our wall!

His signature is on the left, the 'sunday party' is unrelated.  Kinda wish he has written 'wuz hurr' via I enjoy improper English spelling/grammar.

The smiley face was, I believe, a quick self portrait.  Quite the artist!  She also made a salad which was very fancy and delicious.

It was a grand event!  A lot of people asked us to invite them to the dinner but we didn't because we enjoy crushing souls/dreams there wasn't enough room.  But you should consider hosting a simliar event if you so choose!

Will SMCM continue to fund the Governor's Cup race?

Read an article in the Washington Post (joke newspaper in my opinion [not really]) about the possibility that SMCM may stop funding the Governor's Cup race.  The school loses like 18,000$ on it yearly (however I feel like the race also results in a lot of donations).

In the article, Jurgo states that "No one thinks it's appropriate that we spend education funds on it."  I'd like to go on the record right now to say that I think we should spend education funds on all sorts of random stuff like boat races and hot air balloon races and building statues of famous people.  The President's statement is now incorrect, seeing as I do think it's appropriate (okay but not really; he brings up a good point).

It seems like the River Concert series breaks even, which is good.  I still haven't attended this event, but probably will this year.  Jurgo said that he doesn't think it's in danger of being cut.

So really the only thing that seems likely to die is Slackwater.  I don't really know what this is to be honest.  Some journal thing.  I don't know how to read so I have never read it.

Would be pretty lame is the governor's cup died.  My Dad raced in it the past two years and got trophies which are actually small cups which I assume are for drinking rum, which makes them better than real trophies.  The race has been going on for a few decades, and it's a pretty cute idea/race.

Dunno.  Kinda doubt that like Muldoon (who has a legit-ass racing boat in the race) would let it die even though he isn't on the Board anymore (or maybe he is and just isn't the head of it).

Jurgo's Shape Ups

Word on the street is that Jurgo and Lurgo wear Shape Ups, the sketchers sneakers that GET YOU FIT (via walking)

Don't really understand why they are curved/round like that, feels like it would take a lot longer to walk as a result.  Anyway, it would appear new president is in favor of being healthy (vs. being in favor of drinking lots of wine....) which is good.

Or is it?  Can we really trust someone who is going to take short cuts like these 'shoes' to get fit?  Where will other short cuts lay?  Are we going to get boats with curved/round hulls??? (probably yes since I think most boats have round hulls).  Will future buildings be curved on the bottom, thus making them sway back and forth (okay this is just silly/absurd).

Not really sure if these shoes are all that stylish, but I think the hats/suits will counter the negative effects of these shoes regarding that matter.

Jurgo Radio

Finally listened today, the interview with Kyle Jernigan.  I have class usually so I can never listen live.  Feel like someone more important, like the writer of a very influential blog should be on the show rather than some guy who just 'edits' a newspaper.  Don't really know what a newspaper is to be honest, are those like flyers that you see up around campus?

Really diggin the music, reminds me of playing Fallout 3 (via 1950s music).

Kyle says that he does not brag about the newspaper and is very humble about it.  Feel like he is doing this wrong.  If I were Kyle I would probably use my position to obtain bribes and such.  I know that I sometimes run bloggery posts here about events that people ask me to write about, and I generally charge a bribe of one beer.  Feel like if I ran a paper I could charge possibly two or even three beers per bribe.  Or maybe even cash!

Feel like old people are really good at choosing music that goes well with the guest that is being intereviewed (via this Ray Charles song about the news).

Kinda liked this most recent issue because my name is on the front page (via sponsoring bike shop legislation).

Wow Jurgo just tried to imply that Danny 5 Names is not as pretty as the dance show...gonna have to disagree.

Some discussion of going off the record.  I would like to say that off the record I enjoy the point news, but on the record I think it is pure terrorism.

Jurgo is playing a song called "Lies" by the Knickerbockers.  Pretty sure he played this because he feels that The Point News is full of lies, which I'm pretty sure is true.

Thank goodness he is finally playing some Gaga.  Glad to hear that Jurgo don't want no paper gangsta.

Kyle reported google analytics hits of 100 on slow days and as much as much as 400 on fast days.  Gonna check out our numbers and compare.

They are talking about grapevines and rumors.  I personally love grapevine rumors as well as spreading them.

RUMOR:  Is Kyle Jernigan a robot?  Did he lose weight via hard work or through a transformation into a CYBORG?!?!

Good episode overall, I will rate it 8/10.

Urgo Pumpkin

I think everyone's seen it, but this is so glorious

SGA Meeting 10/5/10

SGA Meeting!  Some highlights

• Jurgo came to talk to us!  He brought up issues like campus pub, Aemthyst initiative (dunno how to spell it, don't care), and the size of the college
• Is the college size right now too big, too small, or just right??
• How do yall feel about changing drinking age to 18
• Also brought up this idea of 'dry orientation' wherein everyone signs a pledge to not drink during the first weekend of Orientation.  Interesting idea, what do yall think of it?  Feel like it takes a lot of pressure/fear away from first years who don't know much about drinking, but also feel like I want to hang and drink with friends the first day back, most of whom I haven't seen in months.
• Alex Walls said 'Debbie Downer' and how he doesn't want to be one
• Kyle McGrath said 'the gorilla in the room' instead of 'the elephant in the room' and we all corrected him and kinda laughed at him.  Although '800 pound gorilla in the room' is a phrase, it has a different context/meaning (via wikipediaing it)
• Oh also said that, in regards to paying for stuff at a campus pub, there would probably not a be a 'drinking plan' (via meal plans) which made a me lol a lot.  Actually a drinking plan would be sweet via can limit it to only let you purchase so much.
• Also I yelled at senators a lot for speaking out of turn.  Feel like I am training a puppy to not pee on the ground (andrew reighart being one of the main puppies)

Lady Gaga

Working on getting music for the Crab Feast tomorrow, got an email wherein Jurgo requested that Lady Gaga be played.  <3 u prez.

Really luv Gaga too.  Mom and I bonded over our love of her on the ride down to school last month.

Class of 2011 Crab Feast

Crab Feast!  30$ at Jurgo's house.  Benefit's the Class of 2011, which still needs to raise a lot of money.  Was thinking about not going because it's a bit more expensive than in years past, but Dad said he would buy my ticket (via all the parents got letters about this).  Real cool that the President is hosting this at his house.  Hope he has pets we can play with.  Wonder if we get to use his bathroom.  Kinda want to invite him to my house (via Harrington 3) for family dinner.  Menu would be something like

• Chili (oh my god, roommate Mike Tornabene made Chili the other night, so good) and rice, with tortillas if desired
• A light pasta side
• Some greenery (aka bag of salad and celery added in)
• Goldfish crackers
• Carlo Rossi Wine (only the finest)

President's Happy Hour

In light of the recent announcement of the 'President's Open Hour', Dr. Jurgo has also revealed that he will be hosting a weekly 'President's Happy Hour' at the Door.

From 5-6 on Tuesdays Dr. Jurgo will host the happy hour at the Green Door, featuring a variety of Faulkner inspired drinks (since he loves Faulkner obviously).  Mint Juleps, Jack Daniels, and Southern Moonshine (note:  links explain Faulkner's penchant for the drinks).

As a result of this, SafeRide will now begin running on Tuesdays to accomodate the President's decision.

President's Open Hour

Tuesdays from 1-2 come by the Daily Grind to chill with President Jurgo.

This is real cool, feel like a real improvement from the last President who was abroad w/wine most of the time.  Also, I actually saw Jurgo going to the last basketball game, which was real cool.  I even took a photo with my camera phone.

Really proud of this photo, as he was walking by as I took it, so kinda got lucky that it turn out okay.  PS he's the dude with the hat, not the pretty lady (HELLO COLLEEN VAUGHN!).

Anyways, this is a really cool thing, and the kind of thing that lot of college presidents do (UMD guy, who just got replaced, went to dinner with students/invited them to eat with him at the on campus restaurant Adele's).

gooo Jurgo

DUMBBELLS STOLEN

Recently a pair of twenty-five and forty-five pound dumbbells were stolen from the Fitness Center.  Who could have stolen them???  Today I will try to solve this mystery.


These weights are pretty heavy, therefore it was someone strong.  Football players are very strong, therefore I believe that a football player stole the equipment.  Granted, we don't have a football team (at the moment) but I still believe this is the best theory.


In addition, how did something like this happen?  How did someone smuggle out all these weights?  Did the fitness center supervisor (student who sits at that tall chair looking bored/checking out burly dudes) allow this to happen?  Can we trust Michael P O'Brien ARC employees?


Recently Claire Solinsky, and ARC employee, stated that this was 'not her fault', however I do know that Claire also takes many labs and has drank 'Rikaloff'.

Can we trust people who play take 'hard lab courses' and drink the Rikaloff?  Can we trust Tom Seahawk (via participating in the latter and arguably more difficult activity)???  What is more difficult, Rikaloff or orgo lab?

All I'm saying is that dumbbells were never stolen under the Maggie administration, can we really trust Joe Urgo (who I will now refer to as Jurgo)???


DID FAULKNER SCHOLAR DR. JOSEPH URGO STEAL THESE DUMBBELLS (via getting 'mad ripped' to impress/intimidate students and professors)?