Walking to Campus

Stole this photo from the St. Mary's fbook page, via theft.  It comes from the photo archive, the year 1986.  Most of yall reading this probably weren't even alive then. 

I absolutely love that bike shirt.  Rainbow bikes.  I need that shirt.

-Tommy Seahawk

Great Room Hell

August 23rd is the start of orientation for the class of 2016 which means 500 freshies and their various parental units are currently on campus moving in etc. What this roughly translates to is great room hell via you guys have NO idea what you're doing. As much as we will grow to love you, we maybe hate you the first few times we encounter you in the great room because we are hungry college students and you, yes you, are standing in the way of food. Below please find a list of great room etiquette aka how to not be hated

• Yes, you do use your student ID to swipe in. Just hand it to them. Say thank you. It's that easy.
• Yes, you can use it to swipe in parents/sibs/friends/so's or slutever.
• Don't make the aforementioned people pay for their own food via money. It is so much easier to just swipe them in and you are a freshman with a freshman meal plan. You will never use all of your blocks anyway.
• Please don't stand at the front of the line and have a big conversation with the whole family. Do that before. Oh my god.
• Have your ID out and know how many swipes you need
• If you are waiting for someone either wait outside of the great room area entirely or by the cubbies because if you stand in the middle of the food area I hate you.
• Boxes exist. You can take food out of the great room with them. They are nice. Ask for one when you swipe in.
• You can go back as many times as you want. 
• Big T makes the best crepes 
• Yeah that means you can get more than one huge chocolately crepe
• You're welcome
• Spiced chai is the bomb
• Just be a big kid and put your dirty dishes where they're supposed to go. If you leave them at the table i hate you AND you're an asshole.
• ALWAYS go to midnight breakfast
• At the end of the semester upperclassmen WILL try to mug you for blocks. If you are smart you can receive payment in form of beer which is super nice.

I think that is all you need to know for now. Feel free to add things I forgot in the comments for the education of first years.

-Natty Ho (da intern~)

Tuition

J. Frank Raley Jr. Passes Away

J. passed away recently.  Yall may best know him as the dude whose portrait is hanging in the Great Room (added in...2010???).  Also according to The Bay Net the Great Room is named after him (did u kno this???)

But more importantly without this 'bro' St. Mary's would be a much different place.  He was really instrumental in transforming SMCM into a 4-year institution. 

So thx Raley for helping to establish the St. Mary's we all <3 br="br">

Mold UPDATE

According to a source, someone whose townhouse has mold, some FRENCH-CANADIANS came in to inspect the house.

Excuse me?  French-Canadians?  In AMERICA?  Why is St. Mary's outsourcing jobs to French Canadians?

Can we even trust French-Canadians?  Are they French, or are they Canadian?  What is this dual citizenship nonsense.  PICK ONE, AND PICK AMERICA.

PANIC: Episode 3: Return of the Mold

Guess who's back, back again
Mold's back, tell a friend
Guess who's back, guess who's back?
Guess who's back, guess who's back?
Guess who's back, guess who's back?
Guess who's back?

via that Eminem song

Really miss circa 2k10 when 'mold' was a new thing.  Mold reports were 'unconfirmed' and it was really difficult to get anyone to do anything about it.  But these days they announce mold before school has even started!  Email below~

Each fall we thoroughly prepare and inspect the residences for occupancy, including checking for the presence of mold.  It is not uncommon to find isolated incidents of what could be mold given our damp climate.  This year we have found what appears to be possible mold in some of the townhouses.  Housekeeping staff, Facilities staff, and Residence Life staff went through every unit on Friday and Saturday and we have minor occurrences, mostly on bathroom walls and some linen closets, in some units.  A few areas have spots of suspected mold on some of the upholstered furniture and/or carpet.

We do not want to alarm residents.  However, we know that everyone on campus is quite sensitive to mold issues so we want to be open and transparent when we find it.  It is important to note that this situation is unlike what we experienced last year in CD & PG where we encountered systemic mold outbreaks that were pervasive in each building.

We found one townhouse unit (Morsell 3) where conditions require the early arrival student to be temporarily relocated elsewhere on campus while the carpet and all upholstered furniture and mattresses are replaced.  We found five other units that require some level of carpet cleaning and nine units where some upholstered furniture will be cleaned next week, before classes begin. This work will be done following standard EPA guidelines by a professional carpet and upholstery cleaning firm.

Housekeeping staff are completing spot-cleaning in other units in the bathrooms, kitchens, and linen closets following our normal mold-removal protocols.  This work will be completed by Monday evening. These types of issues can recur during the semester.  We ask the residents to report any suspected mold growth to the Residence Life staff or Physical Plant(240-895-4287) as soon as it is seen.

As always, the safety of our students is our highest priority. We are closely monitoring this situation and will keep you apprised as needed.  If you have any questions or concerns, please contact Joanne Goldwater (jagoldwater@smcm.edu or240-895-4207), Derek Thornton (assistant VP of Campus Operations at dkthornton@smcm.edu or 240-895-4287), or Chip Jackson (ccjackson@smcm.edu or 240-895-4412).

Email is not entirely correct, via some students that were supposed to move into Homer (information based on a trusted source) two three days ago were forced to move elsewhere.  But that wasn't included in the email.  Not a big deal really. 

Actually not a lot to say really.  Mold sucks etc.  Did yall like the title of this post, it was a Star Wars reference.  So that was 'cool'.

Also I have hired an intern for the coming year!  The intern will be putting up flyers and blogging at the intern's leisure. 

-Tommy Seahawk

Beautiful Shot of the 'Hidden' Grave

Found this on the 'internet' recently.  I don't remember the source, via stealing content~

Really stunning, the reflection of the sunset in the marble (idk some sort of fancy rock at least) of the grave.  An English major could probably write something poetic about this, like, the sunset represents the end of the day, the death of the day, and with each passing day we grow closer to our own eventual ends (the grave)~

Hidden grave is one of my favorite stops on the '7 Wonders Tour' via it's one huge troll.  The first time you go on the tour/hear about it you are wondering 'how are we gonna find a grave that is "hidden"' and then you quickly realize the grave itself just says 'Hidden'.  Beautiful.  Something we should all aspire to, to be a troll even in death.

YOLO

Welp...time for me to withdraw from ~college~.  Won't be seeing yall this fall...gonna miss u all

Stay golden~

Class of 2016 Facebook Group

Some of yall may remember my 2014 and 2015 attempts at cyberbullying the incoming classes of freshmen First Years.  These posts were 'enjoyed' by many, and caused others to disparage the good name of Tom Seahawk, via it was kinda cyberbullying.

Times have changed.  Now to 'join' the class facebook groups you gotta be 'approved' by people like Tricia Realbuto and Sola,  I ~guess~ they are just tryna do their jobs...but it makes it hard for me to mine, via blogging.  It also kinda sounds like they are restricting freedom of speech...kinda sounds likes TERRORISM to me...

But worry not, dear readers.  Both administrative emails AND facebook postings can be leaked to the outside world for our ~amusement~.  Take a seat, and take a gander at the newest members of our "Honors" college~

Monica I'm pretty sure you are going to need to pick up Shakespeare's original manuscripts for your intro to English Lit class.  This seems like a silly question, is it ultimately just a stealth brag, a way to show off her 'fancy' Kindle?  Wonder if it's a plebian Kindle or a master-race Kindle Fire? [EDITOR'S NOTE:  This was a paid advertisement]

Micaela you certainly don't have to wear shoes, if you enjoy having massive gashes on your feet.  IDK maybe she is a masochist?  Maybe she read 50 Shades of Grey and realized she is into pain?

I like her analysis that swimming with shoes would be "sorta weird in the deeper parts".  Cause, I guess swimming with shoes is pretty natural in the shallow areas.

Well.  I honestly refuse to believe that Isabel here is not trying to troll us.  There is no way this is real.  I really have nothing else to say.  It speaks for itself.  ~so beautiful~ ~so brave~

Danny you are only allowed to bring 40oz containers of malt liquor, not fish tanks [EDITOR'S NOTE:  My favorite 'joke' in this post].  But she is pretty smart and shows her "Honors" college credentials by attempting to bring two separate 20 gallon tanks.  Also I like how there are specific regulations as to the size of the tanks in To the Point.  And that they had an extended discussion about fish tanks.

This one was interesting.  Rather than anyone attempt to answer her question everyone jumped on the "look at me, I'm an ally, I don't hate gay people" bandwagon and bogged down her discussion.  Which I guess is preferable to anti-gay responses.  Can't really articulate my thoughts on this one exactly but it struck me as an annoying/stereotypical response.

That's all for now.  If my analysis of that last one is incorrect/dumb feel free to call me out on it.  luv yall~ <3 br="br">

Apply to be an Intern!

Would you like a PAID internship here at SMCM LOL BLOG?  Apply today!  Send yer resume (optional) and reasons why you want to be our intern to smcmstudent@gmail.com

Requirements:

• Must be a SMCM 'student'
• Must have a GPA of at least 0.69
• Must know how to blog
• Must understand the improper usage of 'via'
• Must be slightly narcissistic
• Must love dogs (via that movie)
• Must not be a NARP (optional)

APPLY TODAY~

Still the best use of SGA money

So. Shuttle service was supposed to go until midnight. Its 11:30 and its not running. Guess I will sleep on it. Should be a fine bed

What the fuck is a "Teddy Turner" waterfront, where was the all student email?