PANIC: Someone has Stolen a Pillar!

Now that school is back in session I am back on campus (since I am a "student") so I went around documenting some changes. Look forward to boring/moderately funny posts in the coming days.

Now as you can see, one of the posts near Calvert is missing. Did someone steal it? Did Urgo steal it? Did someone run a car into it, just like a few years ago near the Statehouse?

PANIC: Railing at the Campus Center Missing

PANIC! The railing leading up to the Campus Center is missing! Who could have stolen it? Someone who hates the elderly, disabled, and people who need railings?

huh well at least with this missing railing there is now a sweet cup/beer holder outside the campus center, conveniently located in the ground

Kinda disappointed to see Chip Jackson's presidency (idk I guess that is over already?) going in the direction of removing hand rails. #disappointed

Budget Meeting 6/5/2013 PANIC

There was a Budget Meeting yesterday. Urgo was not present, and probably won't be for future meetings and discussions, so as a "campus community" we should "mentally move on." Dad (via Urgo) went out for cigarettes and hasn't come back since (via seasons 16, episode 19 of the Simpsons when Nelson explains that his Dad went out for cigarettes and said 'smell ya later', but then he never smelled Nelson again #sad #bullies).

Anyway, Dorothy Fisher (who I have never met but she has cool lipstick) was there and transcribed a bunch of the questions and answers which is super rad. They are below~ thx bb #grateful(dead)

[Editor's Note: The Q&A is in live-blog format, so it's in reverse order, so read it from the bottom up plz. I bolded some 'cool' questions]

Meeting over everyone go home

friendly reminder to submit q’s to the budget committee via that google doc

Q- can there be a schedule of alumni weekend, or should we just go to the waterfront for 48 hours?
A- ok yeah we’ll send that out to faculty and staff

Q- will admissions committee be present during alumni weekend?
A- yes

Q- think about alumni who are also staff when thinking about branding because they know some shit
A- yeah

Q- why the fuck was there a shortfall?
A- idk but we need to look at data and self-evaluate

Q- hesitation about branding?
A- what are ‘authentic’ messages of St Mary’s? How do we communicate those messages?

Q- is board looking at branding’s relationship to budget shortfall?
A- we have a consulting company (which is obviously pretty shitty?) but this is so sudden (??) that no specific conclusions have been drawn

Q-What is happening with the gallery? (Who asked this? It wasn’t me…)
A-Reduction in operating budget. Cristin will have to decide how the gallery is maintained. The art storage facility has needs that need to be addressed. Selling some of the art is possible, but very complicated and would require we use the money to support the collection. The gallery will probably be kind of open.

Q- what about short-staffed staff depts?
A- this is a tricky one. no deets yet. concerns have been heard

Q- is college’s ‘branding’ changing?
A- short answer yes. Long answer not sure how this will need to change

Efforts to strengthen transfer pipeline for the base and others

Reduced personnel is not going to mean increased workload for remaining personnel. If anything, reduced services

Aaaaand there is now a new student/ family helpline, and admissions is trying to get out the message for first years that everything is stable

Also there is some kind of roster for enthusiastic alumni

Q- what about implementing alumni interviews? Not even as screening but as a persuasive tool
A- this is a great idea, which will be given to admissions

Q- can we harness the alumni to get a lot of energy and also dollars?? Specifically alumni weekend is like tomorrow, so hop to it
A- St Mary’s is all about people, community, stick to our talking points, ask alumni for money this weekend and also ideas

Q- wtf is up with budget increases in specific disciplines?
A- specific alumni gifts (I was wondering this too)

Q- are we asking Rich Edgar to come back??
- long applause-
A- it has been proposed, but isn’t currently in the cards

Also we’ve gotten an assload of donation money recently. Not sure if this is the same $$ mentioned in the email about jurgo or whether this $$ goes toward budget shortfall

Q- continued support for admissions while it reevaluates etc?
A- we need everyones good energy used for publicity and be tactical about reducing budget for fund raising and admissions

Q- is there alumni involvement w/ budget issues??
A- idk
(Beth Rushing is going to take the issue of Alumni back to budget committee for discussion)

also there was a weird discussion about pins that i didn’t understand

Q- will eliminated positions come back when things get better?
A- proposals for all new positions come to budget committee, which is transparent and recommends to president which new budget expenditures get put in place—it sounds like eliminated positions are really gone?

Q- why is the block grant a good thing?
A- it provides a tremendous amount of autonomy and has preserved us through many times of financial hardship—we might tweak block grant but it is here

Q- what about facilities improvements
A- 10% cut to projects this fiscal year. Long term facilities master plan was just completed, basically everything is going to be put off and the plan will be reevaluated and adjusted
A- Anne Arundel hall is state money so it’s going ahead anyway

Q- (convoluted) but I think it was about bloated administrator salaries?
A- no one has thought about this yet but they need to and it will definitely a topic of consideration

Q- why aren’t staff eligible for wage increase?
A- because the state doesn’t earmark money for that specifically and it just comes in a block grant which is different from other colleges and now that we have no money we can’t? Someone also shouted out that they would rather have less or no raise than have people lose their jobs

Q- WHAT CHANGES IN ADMISSIONS ARE BEING PLANNED
A- independent and committee reviews are underway, no actual changes yet

Q- how has commitment to academics actually played out?
A- filling vacant faculty spots, more proposed reduction of academic dept budgets than is necessary to best optimize what comes from where (this didn’t make sense to me)
A- also everyone on the committee wants to hear what you think about budget cuts

Q- dept chair budget cuts were proposed
A- they did a good job and if they have more ideas Beth rushing wants to know about them?

Q-enrollment data
A- final numbers won’t be real until the fall, but we need to plan for 3.5 mil
A- this is a problem that will be with us for a few years, and once we solve this in the short term we will need to keep thinking long trtm

Chip Jackson chokes up: “These are tough times for the college. Don’t let it be divisive.”

Discussion of living wage and furloughs etc: there will definitely be furloughs. there will also not be the recently state-mandated 3% cost of living increase but there will still be wage increases? Lowest end of pay scale gets highest increases. Same with furloughs. Low end of pay scale will get fewest furlough days.

20 vacant positions will “not not be filled” and 18 vacant positions will not be filled

Personnel: it’s possible to solve shortfall without layoffs???

Consistent discussion about implementation of transparency

4 principles for budget reductions:
1) preserve core academic principles
2) focus on teaching
4) work on unfilled positions rather than cutting people
(Sorry, I missed #3)

Budget stuff now:
enrollment level def means 3.5 million budget reduction

Kate Chandler is on budget committee! Also a lot of cool faculty! Also staff, students and administrators! Good.

Q- new/interim pres needs to be willing to conduct internal review and understand ‘soul’ of the college

Q- why doing pres search and admissions reevaluation simultaneously?
A- issues are complex but a ‘course correction’ can still be executed in the short term

Q— why are we using an organization to find a candidate for an interim president rather than looking at internal candidates?
A— we are looking for someone with wide range of leadership experience, not just student life or faculty or fundraising

Q— what is the long term efficacy of these presidential searches—this is the 3rd in 4 years? we need to think longer term than this
A— small, efficient, transparent committee? They’re not sure yet? Counseling with other people who do these kinds of searches (that’s a job?)

Q-  student/faculty involvement in search for short and long term presidents?
A- “A representative” from student faculty staff each. Balance of inclusive and efficient

External agency is seeking interim president. Expect person by July or August. “Not just a placeholder” —not an internal faculty/admin person then

Increasing board involvement on campus. Seeking ideas about how to interact with students more.

liveblogging budget meeting commencing

PANIC! Budget Cuts Redux~

The list of proposed/finalized (idk?) budget cuts got released yesterday via email. You can find the full report here and the cuts themselves here. Warning: this document is long and kinda boring. I went through and pulled out some interesting cuts.

• The Oxford CMRS Exchange Program has been cut completely. Wonder how Maggie O'Brien will feel about that~
• Most departments lost some money, some more than others
• Larry Vote's summer program (I think this is the program that sends singers to Alba every summer?) got cut from 25k to only 10k.
• Nitze lost a lot (all?) of its money
• Alba-Italy Director position was cut
• Audio-Visual is losing 25k which sounds like a position has been cut
• Faculty Development lost 5k which sounds like a lot less Wine for faculty functions
• Campus Wellness Program has been cut (idk what that is, maybe First Responders Network?)
• They are removing a trash dumpster from PG FUCK THIS BULLSHIT
• River Concert Series is being reduced from 40k to 15k :/ :/ :/ (this was bound to happen eventually)

All of this is from my understanding of the spreadsheet, which may not be 100% accurate because even though I took a lot of accounting classes in high school, I never really understood it (we just shared our classwork via email, shoutout to B.A.T. c/o 2007 go Mavericks~) so I probably made some mistakes/have some misconceptions.

So there you have it, lots of cuts. I think International Education got his the hardest? Wonder how students will react~

PANIC: New Budget Cuts

There has been a lot of discussion the past week or two regarding the lack of "new student college deposits."

Vocabulary
New Student College Deposit - n - a $500 deposit that students pay to the school, showing their intent to attend St. Mary's. A student who makes this deposit generally attends the school, but some may "melt" and never attend.

The Issue
These deposits are a really good indicator of how many students are actually going to show up in August. This year the school got a lot of applications (in part due to the new Common Application, which makes applying to SMCM as easy as "checking a box") and the college accepted a good number of students. The issue is that not enough students have "accepted" St. Mary's as their choice, resulting in a lower than expected number of "new student college deposits."

Apparently this shortfall comes in the form of about 150~ less deposits than previous years (including last year, which already had a shortfall). The school was looking for around 124~ more in-state and 24~ more out of state students to submit these "new students college deposits," indicating their intent to attend SMCM.

The fallout
This represents, according to indicators, a budget shortfall of approximately $3.5Million.

(Math? 150~ x $23,000 = $3,500,000~)

This is, obviously, a lot of money. And it is going to have a big impact on several areas of campus (more on that later~) and departments and positions. Faculty and Staff had meetings this week where they were briefed with this new information, which has obviously upset many. The new budget (one where $3.5Million has been cut) is being taken to the Board of Trustees this Friday.

How did this happen?
Apparently (according to Anonymous [still don't know who that dude is but they seem to have a lot of opinions]) Urgo has blamed the lack of enrollment on "failures of facilities and faculty curriculum, but it has nothing to do with changes to admissions in the past two years." Could this be the ghost of Rich Edgar, haunting admissions and causing this to happen? Could this be the result of sacking Rich Edgar and Lisa Crowe last year?

"Failures of facilities and faculty curriculum" seems like a tough sell (hello, let's also take a moment to recognize that this quote may not necessarily be accurate nor correct). When students apply to a college, how much do they look into the specifics of the faculty and curriculum? I feel that there is only so much that a prospective student can know without actually sitting in on a classroom, which very few do (or maybe a lot do this, IDK). Does "the failures of facilities" refer to the various mold incidents over the past years (really decades...)? The "Mold Ship" got SMCM a ton of press #allpressisgoodpress.

What about admissions then? According to students working at the admissions office some "early admission" (I did this!) prospective students received their letters of admission until later than usual. Additionally, these students have stated that "counselors have been encouraged to go to private institutions rather than public."

But why? Could it be at the request of Maureen Silva, new (2010) Vice President for Advancement (AKA fundraising) for the college? It's no secret that more rich people go to private high schools, and rich people are probably more likely to give money to the college. Could this shift be part of this issue?

Theory: More public high school students view SMCM as a reach school, whereas more private high school students view SMCM as a safety school. This could explain the lack of students accepting their admission into SMCM. But this is just a theory, one based in stereotypes and assumptions.

Impact
So what does this impact? A lot of things. Less money means smaller budgets. According to the same Anonymous from above (who appears to be "in the know") and other "sources"the following may be cut

• No new staff positions
• No visiting professors
• No sabbaticals 
• Boyden Gallery will be closed 
• No cost of living adjustments for staff
• Staff job cuts
• Other cuts that will be made throughout the summer

 And a staff that once again feels like they have very little input.

Solution
Is there a solution? Maybe "don't fix what ain't broke" #southernsayings. 

The faculty is obviously upset. They want to delay the voting so that there can be faculty input.

Something clearly went wrong here.

You should be
Mad? Scared? Angry? Disappointed. This is all really disappointing and I hope it does not lead to further big changes. I really just want an explanation.

Note:
This is long. I did not proofread. Some of this information may be inaccurate. Comment with thoughts, corrections, etc. <3 br="">

PANIC: Episode 3: Return of the Mold

Guess who's back, back again
Mold's back, tell a friend
Guess who's back, guess who's back?
Guess who's back, guess who's back?
Guess who's back, guess who's back?
Guess who's back?

via that Eminem song

Really miss circa 2k10 when 'mold' was a new thing.  Mold reports were 'unconfirmed' and it was really difficult to get anyone to do anything about it.  But these days they announce mold before school has even started!  Email below~

Each fall we thoroughly prepare and inspect the residences for occupancy, including checking for the presence of mold.  It is not uncommon to find isolated incidents of what could be mold given our damp climate.  This year we have found what appears to be possible mold in some of the townhouses.  Housekeeping staff, Facilities staff, and Residence Life staff went through every unit on Friday and Saturday and we have minor occurrences, mostly on bathroom walls and some linen closets, in some units.  A few areas have spots of suspected mold on some of the upholstered furniture and/or carpet.

We do not want to alarm residents.  However, we know that everyone on campus is quite sensitive to mold issues so we want to be open and transparent when we find it.  It is important to note that this situation is unlike what we experienced last year in CD & PG where we encountered systemic mold outbreaks that were pervasive in each building.

We found one townhouse unit (Morsell 3) where conditions require the early arrival student to be temporarily relocated elsewhere on campus while the carpet and all upholstered furniture and mattresses are replaced.  We found five other units that require some level of carpet cleaning and nine units where some upholstered furniture will be cleaned next week, before classes begin. This work will be done following standard EPA guidelines by a professional carpet and upholstery cleaning firm.

Housekeeping staff are completing spot-cleaning in other units in the bathrooms, kitchens, and linen closets following our normal mold-removal protocols.  This work will be completed by Monday evening. These types of issues can recur during the semester.  We ask the residents to report any suspected mold growth to the Residence Life staff or Physical Plant(240-895-4287) as soon as it is seen.

As always, the safety of our students is our highest priority. We are closely monitoring this situation and will keep you apprised as needed.  If you have any questions or concerns, please contact Joanne Goldwater (jagoldwater@smcm.edu or240-895-4207), Derek Thornton (assistant VP of Campus Operations at dkthornton@smcm.edu or 240-895-4287), or Chip Jackson (ccjackson@smcm.edu or 240-895-4412).

Email is not entirely correct, via some students that were supposed to move into Homer (information based on a trusted source) two three days ago were forced to move elsewhere.  But that wasn't included in the email.  Not a big deal really. 

Actually not a lot to say really.  Mold sucks etc.  Did yall like the title of this post, it was a Star Wars reference.  So that was 'cool'.

Also I have hired an intern for the coming year!  The intern will be putting up flyers and blogging at the intern's leisure. 

-Tommy Seahawk

Rich Edgar Follow Up, feat. PANIC

The recent post about Changes at Admissions (from a few days ago) resulted in a huge outpour of support for Rich Edgar, to the extent that a Change.org petition was created, asking that Rich be reinstated, which already has over 500 signatures.

Additionally, it seems that the removal of Rich and Lisa has sparked a PANIC among staff members, that they could be next.  This is evident from many staff members supporting the aforementioned petition, but not signing it to avoid being publicly associated.  And the following is a leaked (via Investigative Journalism ™) email which shows that the fear has even inhibited some staff members from initiating a going away party.

Faculty are generally safe from being fired, but staff are not.

That being the case, it would be helpful if one or two tenured faculty would sponsor a party for Rich and Lisa, determine a location, and then ask all of us  (staff included) to   bring little bits of this and that. I think so many of us would like to “be there” for Richard Lisa.

Are staff members overreacting, via this PANIC?  PANIC regarding whether or not hosting a party for Rich and Lisa could get them sacked as well?  Hard to say, but I don't blame them.  It seems pretty clear that this was done during the summer, weeks after Alumni Weekend so that students and alumni alike would have a diminished reaction towards the news.  The email above resulted in the following response

It's very sad that we have to fear being fired for attempting to honor respected and beloved colleagues, who have worked here for decades and deserve our support.  I suggest that one of the first things we take up in the fall is to rededicate ourselves to the "spirit of community" that is proclaimed in our mission statement.  A humane workplace is essential for all of us -- staff and faculty alike.

A response that is hard to argue with.  And granted, we don't know the whole situation inre: why Rich and Lisa were sacked, but any workplace where people are removed so easily is only going to create tension and PANIC among the employees.

Wonder what is gonna happen.  Lots of alumni in the comments on this blog and on the Change.org petition saying that they are gonna 'vote with their wallets'.

Also the bay net http://www.thebaynet.com/news/index.cfm/fa/viewstory/story_ID/28501 picked up the story...I think primarily using what I had already written.  And they referred to this as 'a student blog' LOLZ.

PANIC: Rabid Skunk Attacks

As yall have probably heard by now (via it has been in the Washington Post and Huffington Posts and probably other 'posts' other than this post that I am making now) a rabid skunk bit a patron at Cheeseburger in Paradise.

I once dated a girl and took her to Cheeseburger in Paradise for Valentine's Day. 

Things that I liked about Cheeseburger in Paradise:

• They played Cheeseburger in Paradise every hour, on the hour
• Cheeseburgers

Things that I did not like about Cheeseburger in Paradise:

• Bus boy was in high school and hitting on my date

In conclusion, they deserved it, and I hope more rabid animals attack their patrons.

PANIC: Historic St. Mary's Under Attack!

It appears that last night someone drove their vehicle into the wall outside the recreated Statehouse.  Photos below were graciously provided (AKA stolen from their facebooks) by two SMCM staff members, Tricia and Sushinsky. 

Who could have done this?  I have a few possible theories:

• The Hulk (via the Avengers)
• The British, seeking revenge
• A drunk driver
• A drunk British driver (this is the most likely answer IMO)
• Dr. Urgo on his Vespa (another likely possibility)

According to facebook comments the driver left a license plate.   At the scene of the crime.  The only way they could have been dumber is if they had left their actual license.

I don't even remember what specials the Door has on Tuesdays...so I'm not sure if people actually go there on Tuesdays, via drunk driving.

Another troubling issue is that this road isn't a real road.  It's a small offshoot of Route 5 that no one really has any reason to drive on, for the most part.  Why were they drunk driving on this road?  Did they start on this road (via someone drinking in the park/waterfront) and then try to go home?

Overall a very bizarre attack on History St. Mary's City.  Not sure why the British are still upset about this.

PANIC: David Groupe is Missing a "Ladder"

According to a recent All Student Email, David Groupe (pronounced, Groupie, I imagine) is missing a ladder.  Read the whole email below (click it to see it bigger):

David begins the message simply stating "Has someone borrowed my ladder."  It's not a question, but a simple statement.  I am not entirely sure if he meant to place a question mark at the end of this sentence, or if he is making some sort of a political statement.  What does the ladder represent?  Are we all just ladders, living on this Earth to support others???

According to the email, the ladder is approximately ten feet tall.  It is unfortunate that David Groupe was not able to provide the exact height of this ladder, because many ladders are 'approximately ten feet tall' so I think it will be difficult to distinguish which ladder is his.  However, he does tell us that the ladder is 'aluminum' and has wheels on the bottom (as opposed to ladders with wheels on the top).

Please, won't someone think of the scene shop?!?!  David needs this ladder back urgently (almost as urgently as Nate's all student email [more on that in a future bloggin post] about hamburger buns) so if you drunkenly stole a ladder of all things, please return it.

PANIC: SGA CRISIS???

Been hearing rumblings of people 'debating' at SGA meetings lately.  Not really sure what it is about via never going to them (anymore...sigh) so I talked to some informants to garner some information.

It seems there are two issues that 'people' are having with the SGA.

• President Mark Snyder over break wrote up a new constitution over Winter Break (with limited input from the SGA?) which

1. removes the MHEC (Maryland Higher Education Council) Representative position.  Without discussing it with the current MHEC Rep...
2. changes the requirements for running for President/Vice President of the SGA that they must be on campus in the Spring Semester if they want to run.

Both of the proposed changes must be voted on of course before the changes go into effect.

RE:  Issue 1:  Apparently (via unsubstantiated rumors [via I didn't go]) the current MHEC-bro Mike Hullett did not know that there was this proposed change until the meeting and got upset and had the SGA table (AKA make everyone wait ANOTHER week to vote on it) the measure. Not really sure why he wants to get rid of the position, or discussed it with the current dude regarding whether or not we should have it. 

RE:  Issue 2:  Some speculation that this is via he does not support the White/Reighart ticket, and did this out of spite (via they are currently abroad, but this would not affect them).  Not all that likely via I don't think he is that silly/childish.  Other more reasonable reason behind it is probably that he feels that the new Prez should be trained.  Regarding Mark Snyder and training, from an anonymous SGA member:  "also, if mark is so concerned about training maybe he should have trained his senate" via the lack of legislation (srsly they need more legislation like this wonderful piece of legislation regarding All Capital Letter Emails).

One anonymous bro said on this issue "I think many talented student leaders who have put in their time at SMCM and took advantage of its great study abroad offerings should not be penalized for going abroad the semester before their term would start. The student body should not have to be managed in this way, we should be trusted enough to give power to any student leader, even those who have decided to study abroad for a semester. We know who can represent us well and those who run for this office take it seriously. Extra regulation like this is completely unnecessary and rather offensive when it seeks to possibly limit the chance of a qualified, well-intentioned student leader to lead the school if the student body so wishes it."

IDK Blog-readers.  What do yall think?  Are people taking SGA too srlsy???

PANIC: Leaf Fires Attacking Campus

 

Does anyone know if leaf/brush fires are sustainable? Do leaf fires make for a "green" campus???

My gut reaction was that leaf fires are pretty shitty for the environment, so I did some Googling (via Bing) to gather some research (via putting my liberal arts degree to good use).

Also, the cellphone picture that I took makes the fire look kinda small, but in actuality it was pretty huge.

So, leaf fires used to be pretty common throughout the United States of 'Merica, but today most counties and states ban the practice.  St. Mary's County obviously has not banned leaf fires, via being St. Mary's county.

Anyways, according to the Wisconsin (cheese) Department of Natural Resources, the burning of leaves produces a lot of fine bits of dust and soot that can cause lung problems.  The carbon monoxide released from the burning of leaves can also lead to other health problems.  According to the EPA the burning of leaves produces a lot of air pollutants that can rival the pollution produced by a factory.  Leaves can also be used as mulch or compost instead of burning them.

PANIC: Great Room Planning to Serve Blood

PANIC:  It would appear that the Great Room is going to be serving blood today.  I am not sure what else they could mean by food that is inspired by the series Twilight.

Yes, the Great Room is literally serving Twilight inspired food today.  Not sure how I feel about this.  Mostly feel that this is dumb, but also it is sort of a cute idea.  If they had done Star War Saturday then I would have thought this was awesome.  I just don't understand what they could serve other than blood via vampires eat blood.

Also, does anyone else love the Blade movies?  Best vampire movies.

Also, thanks to Hannah B for finding this GEM.

PANC!: The Chamber of Secrets has been Opened

PANIC!  It would appear that someone has opened the Chamber of Secrets vis-a-vis Twilight Harry Potter.

Not sure if Caroline Cat has been hurt (vis-a-vis that happened to Filch's cat) but hopefully that cat is okay.

Not sure exactly where this was written, maybe LQ?

Source: Tumblr.

PANIC: Students Attacking Faculty Vis-A-Vis Bicycles and Skateboards

St. Mary's City:  News reports are flooding in of students on bicycles and skateboards violently attacking faculty and staff at St. Mary's College of Maryland.  Recently the Director of Public Safety, David Zylak, AKA "Zylak Bro," sent out an email expressing the concerns of several faculty members that they are being targeted by gangs of students dressed with little regard for safety or the well-being of "the olds."  The initial email can be read below (click for big, duh):

As you can see, students need to wear bright clothes in order to not harm faculty members when jogging or biking.  Note the concern of some faculty:

SERIOUS ISSUES YALL.

Safety is a legit issue though.  I bike a lot and even though it's fun to ride through red lights and stop signs if there are other cars around you should seriously stop.  Those are the sorts of things that make drivers hate bikers.

PANIC! Daily Grind has run out of Ice Cream

Recently I went to the Daily Grind and there was no ice cream.  PANIC!  However, I then noticed a sign explaining the situation:

As you can see, the Daily Grind is merely hiding their ice cream for some reason.

Except, there is clearly ice cream in the freezer.

I don't really understand it. 

Crisis averted?

PANIC! Cookie!

Longtime blog lover and fellow History club officer [NAME REDACTED (via I don't think she wants her name here)] recently made this delightful Halloween cookie!  Inspired by the blog obvs.

These are great cookies vis-a-vis they are ghosts and they say PANIC and ghosts are scary.  It's called Honors College Logic™.  [I may want to start making posts about #honorscollegelogic™ wherein I make posts about things that the school does that is funny, like the Mold Ship or proposing a footbridge over route 5.  Yall are getting a look into a blogger's mind].

This wonderful alumnus also sent me this mug:  

This mug is great vis-a-vis it has LEGO on it, and my name is Shelby!

Have a great November Yall.

PANIC: Giant Hulk Monster Terrorizing Campus Trash Cans

Yall may remember the giant Hulk Monster that was terrorizing campus a few weeks ago via destroying trees.  It would appear that this creature is terrorizing campus once again, and this time it is targeting TRASH RECEPTACLES.

Who could possibly knock over a trashcan other than some sort of super strong Hulk monster, possibly one created by the Biology Department.  Is this another diabolical creation by Bob Paul???  Did Dr. Urgo his it with his moped via hitting stuff?

An anonymous tipster said that it may have been the result of 'parkour' which I can only imagine is some sort of sinister Hulk monster activity. 

SMCM LOL BLOG will continue reporting on these disturbing disturbances on campus until the Hulk Monster is caught.  Hopefully the newly commissioned Public Safety officers and Dave Zylakbro are on the case to capture this monster (which was probably created by Bob Paul or the philosophy department).

PANIC: Giant Snake on Campus?

Was on facebook and a photo of a GIANT SNAKE popped up on my minifeed thing.

Not sure if this is an actual snake or some sort of strange hoax or an actual snake.  But this snake is gigantic as definitely a reason to PANIC. 

Looks like it might be in the tree near the Admissions building. 

PANIC!: Water Fountains Secured with Bags and Tape

Just read an All Student Email saying that some water fountains and faucets are being secured with plastic bags and tape.  The bro is saying that there is no need for concern, but I think that there is a need to PANIC!

via PANIC!

(thought this would be funnier when it was in my head, sigh)