I Found Calvert Hall's Crest

The PANIC is over as the stolen crest of Calvert Hall (not the high school, roll dons roll) has been found. Apparently the criminal used a shrink ray, and then put it on a train at the B&O (more like BO heheheh) railroad museum in Baltimore.

Green Fire Hydrant

There are several green fire hydrants near Calvert on South Campus. It seems like a great way to troll firefighters since they are pretty hidden looking.

It's a good idea to place them near Calvert like this too, since Calvert never burned down or anything in the past...

PANIC: Someone has Stolen a Pillar!

Now that school is back in session I am back on campus (since I am a "student") so I went around documenting some changes. Look forward to boring/moderately funny posts in the coming days.

Now as you can see, one of the posts near Calvert is missing. Did someone steal it? Did Urgo steal it? Did someone run a car into it, just like a few years ago near the Statehouse?

A Strong Arm Robbery UPDATE

Thanks to some anonymous commentors we have some SWEET RUMOR MONGERING for yall via "investigative journalism".

I received an email to my smcmstudents@gmail.com account (feel free to email me rumors to rumor monger and nudie pix [only if you got swagger tho]) providing some potential answers to this story of the strong arm robbery.

As yall may remember from my short Three Act play from a few days ago (it won a Tony [that is an award for plays.  I know this because I once dated someone who enjoyed that sort of thing and we watched the awards ceremony.  I didn't really know what was going on] Award already!) there was a string of emails sent out by Zylakbro (Director of Public Safety) about a 'strong arm robbery'.  The final email revealed that something fishy had occurred, but didn't really get into specifics obviously.

The email came from "Big Meaty Idiot" (bigmeatyidiot666@gmail.com).  I am going to assume that this was a throw-away email.  The 666 in the email indicates that the person may or may not be the devil.  Anyway, according to "Big Meaty Idiot" (hereafter referred to as "BMI") there were two individuals who reported the strong arm robbery.  And these two individuals were trying to buy weed (if yall remember from my play, I mentioned that they were definitely not smoking weed in the bathroom, which was a joke because that is what Calvert is known for, but apparently I was not far from the truth???) and I guess they got ripped off and then reported the crime.

These two Honors College students got ripped off trying to buy weed and then contacted Public Safety.

Again these are unsubstantiated rumors, but it definitely sounds possible.  There are some very stupid people in this world.  People who would report a crime wherein their weed money gets stolen.

BMI goes on to explain that more than likely the two 'weed dealers' were caught by the real police, explained what happened (via snitches get stitches), and then the real police told Public Safety, who then contacted JBoard, yadda yadda yadda.

So, IDK if that counts as a false report or not.  This has definitely happened before, but ID even K what happened in those situations.  I am assuming that the police did not help them retrieve the money.

Also, is it common for people to buy weed in a bathroom?  I feel like there are better locations.

Anyway, here is the email below for yall to peruse.

Cherry Pickers Creepin' on Calvert Hall

There is a cherry picker crane machine that is watching people in Calvert (aka Julia Strauss).  Not sure what the deal with this is.  Margaret Brent moving and now this atrocity.

A Poem:

First they came for the Margaret Brent Halls, but I did not speak up, for I was not a hall.
Then they came for the Calvert Hall Windows, but I did not speak up, for I was not a window.
Then they came for me, and there was no one left to speak up.

*tear*

Boh Hunt photo

Step 1:  Steal photo the President of the school posted
Step 2:  Repost said photo
Step 3:  ???
Step 4:  Profit

Dining, Past and Present!

People hav been eating food for decades, both at St. Mary's and in the real world!  Food is an essential part of the college experience, from food fights to the freshman 15 to what you puke up after drinking too much (bonus points if the food is still recognizable!)

Anyways, thanks to the sweet photo archive that the school hosts, we have a glimpse into past dining experiences at SMCM.  Let's take a look!

Above we have a dinner from 1950.  While this may look fancy (via tables are not in long rows) I am guessing this is how these biddies from the Seminary Junior College always ate (note:  dudes started attending by 1949/50, but I'm guessing not many went in the fist year).  Those are some sweet chairs.  Kinda cool how everyone is in a group of exactly eight friends, since every table is filled up.  I guess times were different in the 50s.  Also, they were eating on the ground floor of Calvert Hall, how absurd! I think this might have been before the Calvert Hall fire, but I'm not really sure (via I can't remember).

Moving on, we have this photo from the year 1970!  That kid on the right with the stache looks like Joe Clemens!!!  Woah that is really creepy.  But he also kinda looks like Kyle Prinkey.  And the kid that is closest to the camera kinda looks like Paul Sauchelli.  Regardless, as you can see these dudes like orange juice, even though it isn't breakfast!  They also have trays (which we got rid of a year or two ago) and fancy looking plates and silverware.  It looks very much like a high school sort of lunch.  Note that they were eating in Charles Hall, the precursor to the Campus Center.  You can see a model of it in the Library if you are curious, it's kinda weird looking.

Lastly we have this cool photo from 1973.  It looks like the have stuff set out on plates for people to grab, instead of self-serve like we have today.  Not much else to say I guess, looks pretty standard.

Gonna miss u Great Room.  I didn't get a meal plan this semester, so if you see me starving please swipe me in, and I shall regale you with stories of my past.

ADA Accessible

Dudes installing a wheel chair elevator outside Calvert.

To quote Principal Skinner (Simpsons) "This is a proud day. Now when people ask if we're in compliance the Americans with Disabilities Act of 1975, I can say, we are closer than ever before!"

Shine on you crazy diamond, St. Mary's, shine on.